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Only Yesterday






“I miss you badly, but I have to go.”
From the beginning to the end, a butterfly(actually, there is only one all the time) is always there.
In this story, the butterfly is the “time attached to the little girl’s past memory”, namely the “witness of memories”.


At the very beginning, the girl was haunted by a faint melancholy, but she couldn’t tell or think out where this melancholy
hid concretely. She tried to get rid of this melancholy, so she prepared to sleep after lighting up a candle.

Then she fell into a dream, though she had no idea what dream she would have. At that moment, the butterfly showed up.
It made a different dreamland (dream within a dream) for the girl. She changed her shapes and forms in different dreamland,
and the butterfly took the girl to start a journey, in which everything was unknown, but everything seemed to be familiar.

The girl was totally at a loss. All things along the trip were familiar to her, but she couldn’t remember exactly where
she had seen it. She didn’t seem to realize what kind of journey it was until the butterfly took her to the place where she
used to play.

A sour and astringent feeling began to rose from her heart. That is a sense of inability that she felt herself was unable
to integrate again. All her emotions and all the words she wanted to say were stuck in her throat. She wanted to wake up at that
moment, and this kind of sour and astringent feeling seemed to surge into her eyes. She wanted to say goodbye to past memories.

But the butterfly still didn’t want to leave her, and turned itself into a key. The girl was very curious, so she went into
another dreamland(memories about grandpa) that the butterfly made for her.

This was what buried in the bottom of the girl’s heart, the most soft memory about the past(climax of the story). The girl
felt as if she had been hit by something. She really missed all things here, and, just in a flash, the melancholy before going
to bed got some clues.

And then, she woke up. No matter how the time(butterfly) tried to retain her, she could not stand it any more—the feeling
of “regaining lost things” which would disappear at any time because of the end of the dream.

The most soft memory, the missing buried in the deepest bottom of her heart, was the thing she didn’t want to throw away most.
A strong sense of loss had been hovering in her heart after she realized that she could never recapture it in real life, and all
of
this constituted her melancholy that she could not tell any reason.

“I miss the past so much. But I know I could never go back to that time. And thank you for your detainment. But I’m terribly
sorry, I am going to continue my way, the way of this moment. ”













© joey liu 2022